Emery's Arrival

I reckon I went into labor early in the afternoon on Sunday, January 12. I say that because I don't really know when labor started. I woke up with a horrible migraine that morning, and lazed about until lunch time, at which point I started feeling like I needed to go to the restroom every twenty minutes or so without ever actually going. I think that due to the fact I'd been having Braxton Hicks so frequently and for so long I didn't recognize the contractions as contractions while they were just in the front.

Jacob was at work at the airport that day, and if any of you watch the news you might remember that on January 12, a Southwest Airlines pilot somehow managed to mistake the itty bitty Taney County airport for the twice as large Branson Airport, where Jacob and I work. I was outside at about 6:00 p.m., trying to cool down, when I saw the plane fly over. I remember thinking, "Whoa, that's a huge plane to be landing at Taney County!" Then Jacob called. "Don't wait up for me, I'm going to be really late. The pilot's an idiot and landed at the wrong airport."

I tried to wait up for him, but at 10:30 p.m. I was too tired. I went and laid down, but was up again by 10:45 because my back hurt and I was having "Braxton hicks". That was common enough for the end of my pregnancy, so I went and worked on the finishing touches for the nursery. 

By the time Jacob got home at 11:45, the back pains and simultaneous "Braxton Hicks" were about every six minutes apart. Looking back, I feel stupid for not realizing that those were actual contractions sooner. I guess it was because I'd been having Braxton Hicks for so long, the contractions only hurt in my back. It was dull back pain with what felt like a painless Braxton Hicks at the same time. Should have made the connection, but oh well. We ate supper and tried to go to bed again.

I couldn't fall asleep thanks to the back pain every six minutes. I told Jacob at about 12:30 a.m. that he wouldn't be going to student teach the next day, and downloaded the FullTerm app to time the contractions. I tried to sleep for another fifteen minutes or so, and then decided I couldn't do it and went to take a hot bath instead. Through the course of the night I got a diaper bag packed and did some little tinkery things around the house to keep myself distracted.

I continued to labor at home until 3:50 a.m., when the contractions had been running four and a half to six minutes apart for an hour. I woke Jacob up on accident during a contraction at 3:50 a.m., and he very sleepily asked, "How far apart are they?" I told him, and he got up and dressed faster than I had ever seen anyone before. I laughed at him and told him to calm down and go back to sleep because it would still be a long time and I saw no need to go to the hospital yet. At this point I was still pretty convinced it wasn't real because we were two weeks early.

He got the car seat base installed and found the go bags and the diaper bag and was generally a flurry of movement. I was pacing when he came back in and he looked at me and said for the millionth time, "Did you call Dr. Allison?" I hadn't. He practically had to force me to. She said to go to the hospital, and so we did. 

We got to the hospital at about 4:30 am. The nurses asked me if I was a first time mom, and I said I was. The shift supervisor chuckled and told the younger nurse, "Just get them in a non-stress test room." I glared at her.

They hooked me up to all kinds of monitors, and left me for more than half an hour. Finally a nurse came in and started asking questions. How far apart were the contractions? How long had they been going on? When was my last doctor's appointment? What was my blood pressure then, it was a little high now, was that normal? How far dilated was I at that doctor's appointment? She finally decided she'd go ahead and check my cervix.

I love watching nurses when they get surprised.

Her brow furrowed, and she pulled her hand out with her fingers about 6 cm apart, and said, "Okay, I'm going to go get my shift supervisor to double check."

Sure enough, I was 6 cm dilated and 100% effaced. At that point Emery was turned correctly. The shift supervisor apologized to me, and said that because I was so calm when I came in and wasn't howling in pain they just assumed it was false labor. I told her that I'm tough.

I was taken to a delivery room at 6:00 a.m.

Board in the delivery room

I labored there until 9:00 a.m., pacing the hallways and bouncing on a birthing ball. At 9:00 a.m. Dr. Allison checked me and found me at 7.5 cm. She decided to break my water, and I went back to bouncing on the birthing ball.

At 11:00 a.m. the contractions hit their peak. I had been awake for more than 24 hours, I hadn't eaten in 12 hours, I hurt worse than I had ever imagined possible. I am horribly ashamed of how I acted from here on out. I hadn't taken any pain medication: no epidural, no oxygen, no nothing. I didn't think I could do it, and I said that a million times. I said more times than I could count, "I can't do this, I can't do this, I just want it to be done." 

Kendra, the nurse, checked me at 11:00. I was dilated to 9.5 cm, but Emery had twisted and was sunny side up. We spent from 11:00 until 12:30 with me crying and complaining and apologizing for being such a horrible patient and generally thinking I wasn't going to be able to do this trying to get Emery to flip back. She didn't. At 12:30 they decided that I needed sleep and gave me a low dose of pain medicine. The medicine did NOTHING for the pain, but pain medicine always makes me dizzy and hallucinate and I suppose that made me easier to handle.

I remember being very worried about a giraffe at one point. They gave me oxygen at one point, and I'm not sure why, but I felt like it was suffocating me.

I slept through two contractions, but at around 1:00 I couldn't anymore. All I wanted to do was push and it hurt so bad to fight that. Kendra checked me again, and I was still at 9.5 cm and Emery was still stuck. She got Dr. Allison, who had me get on my hands and knees over the birthing ball. I was like that for a while, and Emery must have tried to turn a little, because they gave me permission to push for a few contractions. It didn't last long before Dr. Allison had what felt like a million hands up inside of me.

There was so much pressure, which I now know was her turning Emery, and then a horrible burning sensation that felt the exact same as the final push. I was so out of it I thought that Emery had been born with me on my hands and knees. I couldn't hear her cry, and I asked Jacob, "Why isn't she crying?"

They got me onto my back and in the stirrups, and I was told to push again. Within four or five contractions she was born. The whole time I was pushing I was apologizing for screaming and still saying I couldn't do it. The last push burned like hell and it felt like I exploded. I heard her cry, and Jacob went to cut the cord, so I relaxed a little bit. Of course I wasn't done.

I passed the afterbirth and they put Emery on my chest and kept sticking their whole arms up in me and pulling stuff out. I could hear them talking about tears and prolapses but then everything started to spin and fade. They grabbed Emery away really quickly and that's when I got scared. I remember telling Jacob that I loved him and Emery, and asked Mama if I was going to die, because I was fading really fast. Dr Allison said, "No, we'll get the bleeding stopped.", and then she and Kendra were doing a million things at once.

The burning I felt on my hands and knees that I thought was Emery being born was actually my cervix ripping as Dr. Allison tried to turn Emery, she was still turned wrong at birth. The final push tore me, as well. The prolapse was (tmi) rectal and due in part to the third degree tear that I earned during that final push. There was a lot of bleeding. They gave me a shot of some medicine I can't remember to help stop the bleeding, and stitched up my cervix and torn vagina.

Daddy post-delivery

I was moved to the maternity ward and was lucky enough to get a private room. The maternity ward was full to bursting, and I am so glad we had a quiet room.

Healing has gone very well. I was dizzy and pale from the blood loss for a few days, and things are very tender still, but I never hurt bad enough to fill the pain medicine prescriptions I was given.

38 Week Update (Last One!)

So this post is very late, and will be followed by the birth story! Taking care if a newborn is hard work. 

Needless to say, I didn't make it to the next appointment like dr Allison wanted. In fact, I barely made it to 38 weeks. I had Emery on January 13, 2014 at 1:51 pm, at 38 weeks exactly. I'll be posting the birth story later. 

How far along? 38 weeks

Total weight gain: I weighed in at 223.
Maternity clothes? I hardly had any that still fit, which is funny considering that I was by no means huge.
Have you started to show yet: You tell me! This was taken as we left for the hospital. The final bump:

Stretch marks? At 38 weeks, they were still like this:

Sleep: i was incredibly tired at the end.
Best moment this week: having Emery!
Miss Anything? Caffeine 
Movement: Her movements are so strong, but there's less of them the bigger she gets.
Food cravings: None

Anything making you queasy or sick: Nothing
Gender: GIRL!
Labor Signs: When I officially hit 38 weeks, at midnight, I was in labor. I was having contractions every 6 minutes, having the bloody show, etc.
Symptoms: Backaches, swollen hands and feet, Braxton Hicks, not sleeping, nesting, cramps, carpal tunnel

Belly Button in or out? It's very close to popping out
Wedding rings on or off? Off. I have it on a necklace
Happy or Moody most of the time: Back and forth. I've been pretty happy.
Looking forward to: getting to know Emmy

37 Week Update

If you haven't noticed, I've been posting my updates towards the end of the week. Technically I am 37 weeks 5 days right now. I've been trying to wait to post until after my weekly appointment, which falls in the middle of the week. 

Way back when I first found out I was pregnant, and for my first few doctor's appointments, my due date was January 24th. I know this to be the actual due date, because I know the day it happened. Based on that, today I would technically be 38 weeks pregnant. All of my appointments were made based on this due date, so they all fall at the end of the week. However, Dr. Allison decided after my ultrasound at 9 weeks that it was more likely that my due date is January 27th, which is what we've calculated everything by since then. 

I still maintain January 24th is when it actually is.

The doctor's appointment went really well. I've gained weight again this week, which made Dr. Allison very happy. I was worried because I've officially gained more than you're supposed to, however Dr. Allison assured me that since Emery appears to be so large, and since I have been holding so much water weight, I'm doing fine.

My strep b cultures were negative! Yay! And the blood in my urine from two appointments ago appear to have been nothing to worry about.

I'm still sitting at 2.5 cm dilated, however my cervix has softened quite a bit, and while Dr. Allison was all up in my business she touched Emery's head. Emmy jumped big time, and Dr. Allison seemed very surprised and said, "Her head is just right there. She wants out!" She also ripped open a blood vein, which has been fun. Emery's heartbeat sounded good, and Dr. Allison said, "She even sounds precious!"

I'm still measuring right where I should, which is good. Once she was finished examining everything, she launched right into what to do when labor starts. If it starts during business hours, I am to call as soon as I know that it is labor and go in to be examined. She said she would most likely send me home to labor where I'm comfortable, but that she would want to examine me first. However, if it's outside of office hours, I'm to call the emergency number after the contractions have been 5 minutes apart for two hours, and then go straight to the hospital. She said it would be different if I wanted an epidural, but since I would like to try without one, that's what she wants me to do.

She ended the appointment with, "I bet you go a week early, at least. I'd like to see you at least one more time before she comes, but I don't know that we'll get that." Eek! I'm so excited. And I feel slightly smug, because a week early would make my due date calculations more correct than they thought.

This week I have developed carpal tunnel, which is loads of fun. I've also reached a point where it takes me twice as long as normal to do everything.

I made curtains for the nursery. We bought a twin sheet, which I'm turning into a crib skirt. I got her some more onesies and sleepers and socks, and an organizer for her leggings and pants. I cleaned and organized Jacob and I's bedroom, and childproofed it a bit. My goal for tomorrow is to finish the nursery, clean the kitchen, and childproof the living room. We'll see how much of that actually gets done. I get worn out so quickly.

On non-baby related things, it snowed and iced again on Sunday and Wednesday, which meant that Alpena cancelled school Monday-Thursday, which meant that Jacob was home with me! His birthday was on Wednesday, so we went out with friends. It has been so nice having him home.

How far along? 37 weeks

Total weight gain: I weighed in at 220.
Maternity clothes? They're all too tight, so I'm in leggings almost all the time. I haven't worn real pants in weeks,
Have you started to show yet: You tell me! This dress is not the best at showcasing the bump, but it gets the point across.

Stretch marks? My old ones have started to darken and lengthen, and look generally horrifying. Like, seriously. Pardon the weird angle and the fact that the belly band of my maternity jeans is digging into my fat, but here's a picture of them:

I've started to develop a couple smaller ones near my belly button, as well as some new ones on my boobs. Which have grown a cup size in the last two weeks, and started to leak like a faucet.

Sleep: I want to all the time, just like the beginning.
Best moment this week: Doctor's appointment, having Jacob home all week.
Miss Anything? Thanks to Jacob's 21st birthday, I miss wine.
Movement: Her movements are so strong, but there's less of them the bigger she gets.
Food cravings: None

Anything making you queasy or sick: Nothing
Gender: GIRL!
Labor Signs: I lost my mucus plug, I've been nesting, she's in the right position!
Symptoms: Backaches, heartburn, swollen hands and feet, Braxton Hicks, not sleeping, nesting, cramps, carpal tunnel
Belly Button in or out? It's very close to popping out
Wedding rings on or off? Off. I have it on a necklace
Happy or Moody most of the time: Back and forth. I've been pretty happy.
Looking forward to: Meeting Emmy

36 Week Update

This week has gone very well. I had a few moments of momzilla in my mind towards the guy who rents a room from us due to his continued incredible lack of courtesy, however he went back to his job at the boy's ranch so I'll have a few weeks of the house to myself.

I also used some of the Christmas money this week to treat myself to my twice yearly haircut. (Don't worry, all but $40 of the Christmas money went straight into savings.) A few months before Jacob and I got married, (two years ago this month to be specific) I had a mishap involving an inexperienced hairdresser and bleach which resulted in a pixie cut. See below:

Jacob, being a man, hated it. He absolutely hated it. He made me promise to at least try to grow my hair out to the length it was when we started dating. My hair was right at bra strap length at that point in my life, and it was the longest it had ever been then. I didn't quite make it that far, but not from lack of trying. My hair hadn't gained any length in almost three months, despite being trimmed every six weeks and treated with love and respect. I hadn't dyed it since May, I had been deep conditioning it, I'm taking prenatal vitamins, I'm pregnant: all things that should have made it grow like crazy. It just wouldn't.

So I decided to go back to short, in specific to a hair style that was my "signature" style for more than a year and that I had been missing terribly. Jacob wasn't fond of the idea of me cutting it, but I explained that I needed a style that would allow me to get out of the shower and be done, where long hair took styling every day, and he seemed to understand. He's still not too happy, though. I have my wonderfully choppy, asymmetric hair back!

We also treated ourselves to a date night for New Year's Eve, since who knows when we'll get one again. I'll probably be taking Jacob out for his 21st birthday next week, but I'm not even sure we'll do that.

We had Christmas with his family last night, and my homemade gifts seemed to go over very well with the nieces and nephews. I made Asher a cape, and crocheted him a red t-rex with a matching cape. I crocheted Zimrie a hat and a green t-rex with a bowtie. I crocheted Hattie a hat, a stuffed owl, and a kitty in a tutu. Now that I know I can do amigurumi fairly well, I'm addicted!

I swallowed my pride applied for WIC today, and I regret not doing it sooner. I know some people will judge us for it, but we need it. We've needed it the whole time I've been pregnant, since we struggle so much to make ends meet, I just couldn't swallow my pride enough to go. It is such a blessing, though. Jacob and I have to live off of roughly $50 of groceries a month, since that's all we have left of our paychecks after bills and gas and such. $50 doesn't go very far, but it's been enough to keep us from starving. I have gone my entire pregnancy taking calcium supplements because I'm lactose intolerant, and we couldn't afford to buy soy milk when it only comes in half gallons that cost the same amount as a gallon of cow's milk. But now we get 4 1/2 gallons of it a month. The same goes for fresh fruits and veggies. I've just bought frozen stuff when it goes on sale, since it lasts so long in the freezer, but now we get fresh veggies. I had a free breast feeding consultation and class today, which is something I haven't been able to afford. Jacob is getting his TDAP for free, when we hadn't been able to get that vaccine for him since he doesn't have insurance.

I just feel so blessed that we can get this help, especially as we adjust to living off of $800 a month for three people.

Jacob started student teaching yesterday, which is very exciting!

I had my 36 week appointment yesterday, as well. It was the first doctor's appointment I have ever had by myself, and let me tell you, I was terrified. I lost five pounds in the last week, which Dr. Allison was not happy about, but that was due to the timing of the last appointment, I'm sure. My blood pressure was high at the start of the appointment, but had gone down by the end, so they weren't worried. I had a strep B culture (bleh!) and my first internal exam to check my cervix. 

I lost my mucus plug on Wednesday, and she confirmed that that is true. I'm dilated to 2 1/2 cm, but she said my cervix is still fairly hard. Her estimate is that I'll be holding a baby within two weeks. I am freaking out, because the house is not ready. I haven't baby proofed. I haven't deep cleaned. Her nursery still doesn't have curtains, or a crib skirt, or the bed made. I don't have anywhere near enough baby clothes. I seriously only have four pairs of socks for her. Four. We have all of three newborn onesies, and one newborn sleeper. AND we only have three 0-3 month sleepers and ten onesies, and nothing else. Like, literally nothing. Jacob was so paranoid all we would get is clothes from the showers but we got next to none. I'm just freaking out.

How far along? 36 weeks

Total weight gain: I weighed in at 214.
Maternity clothes? Starting to get too tight
Have you started to show yet: You tell me!

Stretch marks? My old ones have started to darken and lengthen, and look generally horrifying. Like, seriously. Pardon the weird angle and the fact that the belly band of my maternity jeans is digging into my fat, but here's a picture of them:

I've started to develop a couple smaller ones near my belly button, as well.

Sleep: Growing rare by the day
Best moment this week: Hair cut!
Miss Anything? Not being pregnant
Movement: She's slowed down some with her movements, I think because she's so big.
Food cravings: None
Anything making you queasy or sick: Nothing
Gender: GIRL!
Labor Signs: I lost my mucus plug, and I've been nesting!
Symptoms: Backaches, headaches, heartburn, swollen hands and feet, Braxton Hicks, not sleeping, nesting
Belly Button in or out? It's very close to popping out
Wedding rings on or off? Off. I have it on a necklace
Happy or Moody most of the time: Back and forth. I've been pretty happy.
Looking forward to: Meeting Emmy

33 Week Update

It's snowing again. I am so over winter.

Tomorrow I go to the hospital to preregister, and I am so nervous! The roads are still bad enough I've been hitching rides to work to avoid driving, but tomorrow I don't have a choice.

Work has been a bundle of chaos thanks to the weather. In case you haven't been around airports in the winter, there's about a million extra steps that go into getting planes out when there's ice and snow everywhere, and people tend to get EXTRA dumb. It doesn't help that we're so short staffed, as everyone is using the last of their vacation time before it disappears at the end of the month. The good news is I'm down to 12 days until maternity leave, and 49 days until Emmy's due date.

How far along? 33 weeks

Total weight gain: I have no idea, but I can tell you that Emery is HUGE
Maternity clothes? I wear them! All the time!
Have you started to show yet: You tell me!

Stretch marks? My old ones have started to darken and lengthen, and look generally horrifying. Like, seriously. Pardon the weird angle and the fact that the belly band of my maternity jeans is digging into my fat, but here's a picture of them:

Sleep: Rare and fitful
Best moment this week: Ehhhhh, I guess the bubble bath I'm about to take
Miss Anything? My grandpa, sleeping
Movement: She's moving non-stop again. I jinxed it by saying she was moving less. Hiccups every day!
Food cravings: None
Anything making you queasy or sick: Nope!
Gender: GIRL!
Labor Signs: Definitely not.
Symptoms: Backaches, headaches, heartburn, swollen hands and feet, Braxton Hicks, not sleeping,
Belly Button in or out? Still very much in. I don't think it will come out, but it is much shallower
Wedding rings on or off? On, for now.
Happy or Moody most of the time: So, so moody.
Looking forward to: A break from work!

31 & 32 Week Updates

This has been the passing of another two uneventful weeks in the life of Amanda Leach. I'm afraid my days consist of work, more work, and sleep. 

Jacob's parents were here from Haiti, which is one of many reasons why I didn't post at 31 weeks.

We went to my parent's house for Thanksgiving last week (which is why I didn't have a post at 31 weeks). It was wonderful to see my family, as it always is. I ate far more than I should, which is part of why I've been avoiding the scale lately. I also had a mishap while trimming my hair that involved a playful cat, and now I have bangs again. I have a love/hate relationship with bangs, so this had been particularly upsetting, however I had no choice.

The last two days I have been trapped in my house by snow and ice. Lots of it. I know we had a half inch of ice before it started snowing, and it appears as though we've gotten 8-10 inches of snow on top of that. The HOA has done NOTHING about the roads, which has pissed me off royally. I pay them $48 a month. That covers yard mowing during the summer (which they did only once a month) and road maintenance in the winter, as well as maintenance on the well (we still pay a water bill, though, so this makes no sense to me). 

This summer, as my grass would reach six to eight inches tall, I would say to myself, "It's not that big a deal. They at least keep the roads clear when it snows, which is more important." Yeah. We knew about this storm for a week in advance. MoDot put salt in the roads they maintain in preparation. The HOA did nothing. It sleeted and snowed all day Thursday. They did nothing. It snowed all day today. They still did nothing. I had three cars almost spin out into my yard today, and still the road stays covered by a half inch of ice and eight-ten inches of snow. Bah. Lord only knows how I'll get to work tomorrow.

On top of the already depressing weather yesterday, Southwest Airlines announced they'll be pulling out of the airport, which is a death knell for my place of employment. It means I can see with 100% certainty when my husband and I will no longer have a job. This is soul crushing in and of itself, but the worst part is that I found out from a local news station. No one at work saw fit to call me after the all hands meeting they held immediately after Southwest's announcement to warn me, "Hey, KY3 is about to run a story about Southwest pulling out of the airport, and all of your family will be calling you flipping out over this. Head's up!"

Perhaps the hormones are causing me to over-react to everything, but I'm ready for this week to be over.

How far along? 31-32 weeks

Total weight gain: I have no idea.
Maternity clothes? I wear them!
Have you started to show yet: You tell me!

31 Weeks, post Thanksgiving meal #2

32 Weeks

Stretch marks? My old ones have started to darken and lengthen, and look generally horrifying
Sleep: Still not able to sleep through the night. Between how bad my back hurts, Emery's hiccups, and charlie horses sleep is precious and rare.
Best moment this week: Seeing my family at Thanksgiving
Miss Anything? My grandpa, sleeping, wine
Movement: She's moving less, due to the fact that she's huge, but we had the first painful movement this week.
Food cravings: None
Anything making you queasy or sick: Nope!
Gender: GIRL!
Labor Signs: Definitely not.
Symptoms: Backaches, headaches, heartburn, swollen hands and feet, Braxton Hicks, not sleeping,back pain
Belly Button in or out? Still very much in. I don't think it will come out, but it is much shallower
Wedding rings on or off? On, for now.
Happy or Moody most of the time: So, so moody.
Looking forward to: A break from work!

22 Week Update & Gender Reveal

Little Booger is a girl! Jacob was incredibly surprised, and I could not be happier! I wanted a little girl so badly, and all I heard from Jacob and his family were, "Leaches don't have girls! Leaches don't have girls!" His grandma even had my Mama mentally preparing herself for a boy, and Mama had been saying from the start it had to be a girl, because Stewards always have girls first.

She's definitely a girl, though.

That, my friends, is a baby with girl bits. Jacob and I will be naming this little one Emery Gail. From the ultrasound it looks like she's got my horribly awful chin, and the Leach nose. Dr. Allison said that the reason I was measuring so large, and the reason it sometimes sounded like two heartbeats, was due to her size. Apparently Emery is going to be more like a Snyder baby than a Leach baby. Leach babies usually run right around 6 pounds, whereas Snyder babies average out at 9 or so. Dr. Allison said she's thinking Emery will be at least 9 pounds. Yay.

How far along? 22 weeks

Total weight gain: I still haven't seen my weight. I prefer it that way, as I think it would be way too easy to trigger my weight related anxieties right now.
Maternity clothes? I am in mostly maternity clothes, with a few pre-pregnancy pieces thrown in. It's starting to cool off here, (finally!) and I'm finding that my clothes are not geared for fall/winter, so I'll have to add to my collection shortly.
Have you started to show yet: You tell me!

Stretch marks? None that I didn't have already.
Sleep: Lots and lots of discomfort and weird dreams
Best moment this week: The ultrasound!
Miss Anything? I'm still missing being headache free. I also miss being able to get up and bend over without a hassle.
Movement: Sooooo much. She never stops!
Food cravings: Gardettos!
Anything making you queasy or sick: Prenatals, still
Gender: GIRL!
Labor Signs: Definitely not.
Symptoms: HEADACHES, general discomfort, vivid dreams, backaches, Braxton Hicks, movement, breakouts, swollen feet, etc.
Belly Button in or out? Still very much in. I don't think it will come out
Wedding rings on or off? It's on a necklace around my neck.It still fits just fine, but the fact that my hands and feet have been swelling and then going back to normal and then swelling again was making the ring rub my finger raw.
Happy or Moody most of the time: Moody, for sure.
Looking forward to: Decorating the nursery!

Maybe a Picture Would Help...

Today's hint on our quest to guess the gender is a picture of the ultrasound! Or, well, one of them. I know some doctors offices give you a disc with the photos, or even with a recording of the scan, but we get sent home with a strip of photos that look kind of like they came out of a photo booth. We don't own a scanner,and in any case they are all attached in one long strip that I have no desire to cut apart to be able to scan, anyway.

Little Booger is shy, and very, very active. I knew that, as I've been able to feel Little Booger since around fourteen weeks, and Little Booger hasn't seemed to stop moving since. While Dr. Allison was trying to measure all of the important bits, and be sure everything was forming correctly, it was a constant chase with me flipping over every few minutes to get Little Booger to move into a position that would work.

We saw several yawns, what looked like some suckling, lots of thumb sucking and hiding behind little hands, and so much kicking and flipping that Dr. Allison at one point asked if I had had caffeine that morning (I hadn't) and then said in the most sympathetic voice, "You probably feel all that all day long, huh? Baby thinks you're a trampoline."

In this picture we finally caught Little Booger with hands away from the face, but only because I needed to be punched right before this picture. Little Booger was mid stretch, which is why the legs are high up like they are. It was so fun to watch on the ultrasound, but right after this Little Booger pushed on one side of my uterus with little feet, and on the other with little hands.

Does Little Booger look like a boy or a girl to you? Let me know!

I Know A Secret

Pre ultrasound pictures!

We had our anatomy scan and ultrasound today, and I know all kinds of juicy secrets now. I'll be doing the official gender reveal as our 22 week update, so until then, let's play a game! Below is a list of old wives' tales and what gender they predict I'll be having. Above is the most recent picture of how I'm carrying.

To aid in your choice, I'll give some family history. Jacob's grandpa Marvin Leach had seven brothers, and four sons. His father had three boys, and one girl. Jacob's brother has two boys. Jacob's grandpa Marvin Vore had eight boys and two girls. I have heard at least once a week from Jacob's parents, grandma, and brother that Leaches don't have girls, unless it's a fluke.

My great-grandma on my dad's side had three girls. My grandma Snyder had one son and one daughter. My great-grandma on my mother's side had four boys. My grandma Killingsworth had two daughters and one son. I have two brothers. The Killingsworth tradition is to have a girl first. 

So,comment below which you think it is!

20 Week Update (Halfway There!)

This week has practically dragged itself by. I feel like it has taken forever to get to the point I'm writing a new blog. A lot happened this week, and they were all things that have one of those nasty two-sided effects: it sucks in the short term, but in the long term you have to do it or the consequences will be disastrous. 

My car broke down on Tuesday in the most delightful way.I was at a stoplight when the engine suddenly started making the sound of a train whistle and it started overheating like crazy. It's had a slow leak since I got it, and I suppose it reached the point where it couldn't take it anymore. I made it to work, and while I was working flights 1141 and 1133, my parents apparently drove out and put water in it, and called to make an appointment.

The darned thing took $1250 of repairs. For one part. Like I said, it sucks in the short term, but long term it had to be done.

Jacob also got a second job this week. We've known for a while that we need another source of income, and I can't really find one, as most places don't want to hire someone who can only work Thursdays and Fridays and will be leaving in January. The thing that sucks so much about it is that I will literally only see him for half an hour in the mornings, and on weekends before and after work. He'll be working Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, on top of school and his other job, and he has night classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays until 9, and I can't stay up that long.

How far along? 20 weeks

Total weight gain: Dude not even kidding, I'm up another 3 pounds this week, putting me at 4 above my starting weight.
Maternity clothes? Like I mentioned a couple weeks ago, my Mama bought me some maternity shirts. I've since turned a pair of jeans and a pair of work pants into maternity pants (tutorial on Wednesday!) and will be making some old nasty shirts into maternity shirts.
Have you started to show yet: Undoubtedly. I look like I'm due in a month, not four and a half. The amount I've grown in the last week is mind boggling. For comparison purposes:

Stretch marks? None that I didn't have already.
Sleep: I've been having lots of nightmares, still. Sleep is uncomfortable and restless.
Best moment this week: Jacob got a second job. I feel very conflicted about it, but I know that we have to have it in order to survive financially once Little Booger gets here
Miss Anything? I miss going a day without a backache or headache
Movement: There is a TON of movement. I swear, the kid never sleeps
Food cravings: Not really anything this week,
Anything making you queasy or sick: My new prenatal vitamins make me quite nauseous, still
Gender: Unfortunately, we still don't know, and won't know until week 22.
Labor Signs: Definitely not.
Symptoms: HEADACHES, general discomfort, vivid dreams, backaches
Belly Button in or out? Still very much in. I don't think it will come out
Wedding rings on or off? Still on, but there is swelling on hot days.
Happy or Moody most of the time: I would say I've been fairly normal this week.
Looking forward to: The gender reveal, and reassurance it isn't twins.

19 Week Update

This week has gone by very quickly, and overall has been good. 

One of the ladies I work with (who claims that she has never been wrong about a gender prediction) asked to feel my bump on Wednesday. She rubbed and smiled for a few moments, and I couldn't help but think she looked like a gypsy looking into her crystal ball the whole time, then happily announced, "There's at least one boy in there!" I'm sure I looked like she just told me about the current events in Syria, but that's just too many people making twin hints that haven't been proven wrong.

We had our 18.5 week doctor's appointment on Thursday, and despite how much we hoped she would do the ultrasound, she didn't. While she was using the doppler to hear the heartbeat, Little Booger reared back and kicked the doppler. Dr Allison and I both got a kick out of it, pun intended. L.B kicked it a few times, and at the end she said, "The old wives would say it's a boy, and a playful one, at that!" 

She gave us the choice of going ahead and doing the ultrasound, or waiting until our next appointment so the scan would be easier, and so she could be sure to see the gender, even if Little Booger was being shy. Jacob was immensely disappointed, but I think it's for the best! 

The only thing about it that has made me EXTREMELY nervous, was one of the last things she said to us. She was listing the reasons it better to wait, and she ended with, "Plus, it'll give you more time to prepare for the thought of two babies before we confirm there's only one." I'm seriously hoping that everyone knows how terrified I am of having twins, and that's why literally everyone keeps saying it'll be twins, but it is absolutely freaking me out.

My coworkers have not helped one bit. In specific I have a coworker who has four daughters, who when she listened to the heartbeat smiled and said, "I hear two." The lady I work with who has never been wrong about a gender prediction told another of my coworkers last week after making her prediction that she thought she felt two babes, but that she didn't want to say anything to me in case I didn't know yet. And then I had a passenger -- a woman who didn't know me from Eve-- come up to me and say, "I'm a psychic, and  just thought you should know that your little boy and girl are doing great in there, and will go far with their lives."

How far along? 19 weeks

Total weight gain: I'm up to 186 this week. It blows my mind to think that I gained four pounds that quickly, but I suppose that's just my body getting used to not throwing up every day and actually having an appetite.
Maternity clothes? I still haven't purchased any more, however I should be very soon. I definitely need to buy some more. Wearing the same few outfits over and over gets very old.
Have you started to show yet: I did it! I popped! The bump is unmistakably a baby now, and not just extra flab that I don't need.
Stretch marks? None that I didn't have already.
Sleep: I'm still having a hard time getting comfortable, and I've been having really weird dreams, so sleep is still fitful.
Best moment this week: We had our doctor's appointment this week, and while Dr. Allison was using the sonar to find the heartbeat, Little Booger kicked the doppler. It made me very happy.
Miss Anything? I'm still missing not looking so fat, or at least looking more pregnant. I miss thinking I look ok.
Movement: So very much. Any time anything puts pressure on my tummy, Little Booger kicks it.
Food cravings: Pretzel M&Ms
Anything making you queasy or sick: My new prenatal vitamins make me quite nauseous.
Gender: Unfortunately, we still don't know, and won't know until week 22.
Labor Signs: Definitely not.
Symptoms: HEADACHES, general discomfort, vivid dreams
Belly Button in or out? Still very much in.
Wedding rings on or off? On, but some days I feel like it should be off. The swelling is hit or miss.
Happy or Moody most of the time: Weepy is the best word for it.
Looking forward to: The gender reveal, and reassurance it isn't twins.

18 Week Update

All ye squeamish run away from the following story and picture. You've been warned.

My Mama and youngest brother came to see me on Friday. Mama claimed it was to bring me the crib and rocking chair, but she came bearing only my baby brother, Jason, and his incredibly infected ingrown toenail. I wanted to be a doctor all of my growing up years, so every time anything wound-like happened in my family, the injured party was brought to me. When Daddy had five brown recluse bites at once, I drained,packed, and doctored them all. When Mama had MRSA, I lanced and packed that bad boy. 

You get the point.

Jason's toenail had fallen off a couple of months ago, and in growing back it had become ingrown. This is very common. Lord knows I had my fair share of god-awful, nausea inducing ingrown toenails as a child. I think everyone did. The difference between Jason and I is that I had the pain tolerance of a gladiator, even as a 12-year-old. He has the pain tolerance of a newborn. You poke him and he cries.

He hadn't let anyone touch his foot. 

I saw the infection, and asked him about it.  I asked if he would let me fix it. He looked at Mama all scared-like, and she said the words I'd heard her say to my Daddy and my brother Jack a million times, "If you let anyone fix it, it should be Sister. She's good. You know that next to me she loves you more than anyone else in the world does."I should have known when that made me cry I was not in the emotional state necessary to do this.

I have never seen an infection like this one before. I literally had to cut the infection (which was the size of a pea) out of his toe. He took the first cut like a trooper. He started to falter when I got the first chunk of infected goop out. We took an advil and foot soaking break, and then it got bad. Emotionally.

My next step was to pry the nail out and shove cotton underneath his barely grown back nail. I kept telling him the whole time how well he was doing. Knowing my baby brother like I do, I kept saying things like, "I know this hurts. If it didn't hurt they wouldn't torture prisoners of war by shoving things under their nails, and it would definitely never work when they did."

I got the first bit of cotton under his nail and took a break, so he could calm down and soak his foot in the epsom salt some more. The last bit is what killed me. The second I started Mama told him he could cry -- scream, even. And my baby brother did. He cried, and said things like, "It hurts worse than being shot, I know it does." It was heartbreaking

Then I realized that I was the one hurting him. I love Jason like he was my own baby, thanks to the fact that I watched him from the time he was born so Mama could work. As soon as I got the last piece of cotton in, I assured him it would start feeling better in a couple of hours, since the infection was gone and the toenail was lifted away from the skin, and went to my bedroom to cry.

I have done more painful things to people I love just as much in order to help them before, and it had never gotten to me like this did. 

I learned today that I can do it. I had been worrying about being able to punish Little Booger, and doing things like pulling splinters, and fixing ingrown toenails. I had been worried that knowing I was hurting my baby would kill me. I can do it. I hurt Jason more than he'd ever been hurt then, but I know that by Saturday morning his toe was back to normal, and he wouldn't still be limping around like he had been since his nail started growing back and the infection started.

How far along? 18 weeks

Total weight gain: I'm up to 182 this week. This is most likely thanks to the fact that I haven't been sick in two whole weeks. I know, it's a shocker.
Maternity clothes? My wonderful and amazing Mama, and my wonderful and amazing grandparents were lovely enough to help with maternity clothes. Mama got into a bidding war on eBay for a lot of maternity shirts, and my grandparents gave me a check. I've yet to use the check, but I will be soon.
Have you started to show yet: Most of my friends who have children "popped" around the 16-20 week mark, so I was hoping that this week I would cross from "Is she pregnant or is she fat?" into "When are you due?!" Unfortunately, no. Still just look fat. Self-esteem is still very beaten up, as well.
Stretch marks? Praise Jesus, no new ones that I can see. I have been finding spider veins like crazy, though.
Sleep: Sleep is still very fitful. I found a way to position myself on the boppy nursing pillow (which I found for $7) so that I'm on my stomach, but there's no weight on my lower abdomen.
Best moment this week: Little Booger got the hiccups for the first time, which was fun and exciting, until thirty minutes later when I was still being poked every few seconds from the inside.
Miss Anything? I miss having a face for a face, instead of a moon pie with eyes and a mouth.
Movement: Most assuredly. Jacob keeps insisting that it's twins, and with the amount of movement there is I would agree with him, if it weren't terrifying to think about.
Food cravings: No real cravings this week.
Anything making you queasy or sick: Eggs
Gender: We still don't know, but I'm feeling boy. Definitely feeling boy.
Labor Signs: Definitely not.
Symptoms: Headaches, heartburn, acne, spider angiomas, and red spots on the face and neck.
Belly Button in or out? Still very much in.
Wedding rings on or off? On, but some days I feel like it should be off. The swelling is hit or miss.
Happy or Moody most of the time: Moody. Oh so moody. Reference the story time above for proof.
Looking forward to: The gender reveal in a month, and subsequent nursery decorating.